Miss Kiss

Miss Kiss is a very bad girl. She never wanted to be bad at first but she see her big brothers being so bad that she not know another way to be… so now, she a very, very bad girl.

She is the very best bad girl that she can be. She make the whole world scream with excite and delight when she play her games and give out her kisses.

Mr Frowns never smiles, so they call him Mr Frowns, and Mr Smiles never frowns, so they call him Mr Smiles. Miss Kiss does a bit of both, but she also like to kiss, and she has perfect, pretty lips.

Don’t you think they are so pretty? So perfect and plump. So perfect for you.


We like to play in the neighbourhood. Miss Kiss and her big, bad brothers. All the games are so fun! Everybody like to play with us! Miss Kiss never used to be allowed to play because she was too small but now she is a big, bad, beautiful girl so there is a place for her in all of the games. She having so much fun with her brothers!

Kiss chase is her favourite game. It is so easy to play because everybody wants to lose and get a kiss from Miss Kiss. She knows this! Her big, bad brothers tell her so.

Everybody runs but they find themselves in empty alleyways or trapped in the house. No way out. No escape. They do it on purpose. They want to lose the game and share a kiss with blissful, big, bad, beautiful Miss Kiss.

We chase them through the streets at night because we are so naughty. No bedtime. No time out. Every night when the sun falls out of the sky, Miss Kiss and her big, bad brothers play our games in the neighbourhood and we invite anybody who is out after dark to join us.

Miss Kiss just had a fun game but she is not ready to go home.

Miss Kiss found a silly sausage. Silly sausage was new in town and lost like a little puppy dog. She smile at him. Mr Smiles smile at him. Mr Frowns burst into tears but he is a bad boy having a bad day, so everybody understand.

Silly sausage looks so scared. He’s just pretending to make the game more fun. He run! He run and run and run but we know the streets so much better and we find him again and again.

He scream but nobody come from their houses. Some watch from the window, wait for it to be their turn to play. They never come out when they see us playing because they know that they will lose.

We chase him to the park and he run where we want him, like a rat in a maze. All of us around him. Ring a ring a Rosie. London Bridge is falling down.

Silly sausage falling down too. He fall down after he trip on all the twigs and grass and Miss Kiss see her chance to win!

She climb on top of silly sausage and he scream with so much excitement. She can see his soul spilling out of his mouth.

It was the best game yet. Silly sausage kept wriggling and Miss Kiss brothers was giggling and Miss Kiss was so hungry.

Just a little nibble. Just a little peck. On the cheek. On the nose. On the eye.

Tear it out.

This is how you play the game.

Tear it out.

Miss Kiss won so she gets all the rewards!

Tear it out.

So crunchy. Silly sausage. Pretty blue eyes taste like sherbet. Swallow like a good little girl. Swallow.

Brother Frown and Brother Smiles. Big boys with big blades. They swing and sing a lullaby. Rip the sausage open so that the family can feast.

Miss Kiss loves her sausage, so she keeps his heart in her hands. Holds it so tight that it stops pounding. It’s so squishy and so silky. Tastes like honey and soft candy.


No noise. Shhh! Still, silly little sausage is sleeping now. He lost the game. Miss Kiss won! So she find a new friend!

Miss Kiss always want new friends to play with.

You like to play?

You want a kiss?

Miss Kiss knows the truth about you. You watched like a peeping Tom. You peeked through the curtains like a nosy Nigel.


You’ve been watching and waiting and wanting.

You come and play now?

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