Posted in Blog

Ella at The End Of The World – Episode Eleven

Read more of Ella at The End Of The World

I was thinking last night, about my life, before all this mess. I couldn’t sleep, and Martin wouldn’t sleep (I imagine he was worried I’d make another break for it), so we just started reminiscing.

It’s weird, to think that some guy I met on social media ended up not only being my husband, but my only companion, for the end of the world. I wasn’t even planning to follow him back. It wasn’t personal, I was just tired of men. The great thing about bisexuality, is that you have options. If I decide I don’t want to put up with men being… well… men, there are plenty of women for me to fall in love with instead, but, something about him just made me want to give him a chance. Sometimes, there were little moments of “He’s just like all the others!” but for the most part, he was exactly what I had always needed in a partner, so, reader, I married him.

I remember the first time we met in person. I had fantasised about it for months, imagining some serene Hollywood romance moment, where I would run from the departure lounge, into his arms, and we’d kiss, as music played and doves surrounded us. It was, in fact, an awkward affair. I hid in a toilet, at first because I was nervous, and then spent a few seconds panicking in the toilet, wondering if he was now thinking about me being in the toilet, before rushing out of the toilet, and sort of awkwardly arriving in front of him. There was no kiss, but that was mainly because I was so overwhelmed with how much I wanted to simultaneously spend my life with him, and die of embarrassment at how socially awkward I was being.

A kiss did come later, though. In a car park, and while there were no doves, and no soundtrack, it was more than I’d ever dreamed of. And just now, while I was typing away, another kiss came, gently, on my shoulder, as his hands found my waist, holding me close, and dear reader, though I am still confused and conflicted about my feelings about what he’s done, and where we are, I am so glad that I married him.

I imagine we will have to get moving soon. Martin likes to keep moving as much as we can, and given that we are closer to a city now, we are more likely to run into infected soon, so it’s probably for the best. I’ll speak to you then, wherever I end up.

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