Sincerely, Jennifer x

15th November 1828

My sweet, darling Agatha, 

It is done. 

It is done, and there is nothing else to do. 

There is no redemption, and no way to be saved for what I have done. 

I could never be saved, if I were to be honest. I have shared this vessel with such unclean, unspeakable things, and so it is expected that I too have become unclean and unspeakable.

Its eyes filled the room. I could feel the scorching scorn dotted around each corner of the place as I descended down into the hold. 

“Let us be free, William, and you shall be spared.” 

The voice. Oh… God help me, the voice. Everywhere as I met its gaze, I am overwhelmed by words. 

A wall of the crate fell, and I closed my eyes, desperate not to see. 

I am spared, but I am soaked in the sickness, because like everyone aboard, and all of us who wander the streets every day, with our eyes closed and our minds distant, I am guilty.

You are guilty too, my sweet. 

We may not be able to afford the finer things, but still, you wear unclean things, and the consequences shall be unspeakable. 

Though my eyes were closed, I was still at the mercy of their words 

“They cry every day, William.” I wept too, feeling its warm breath on my cheek as skeletal fingers, with small slips of skin prised my reluctant eyes open. 

We cried together. I, a man–just a man, and the creature, bones, blood and so many scarlet, shining eyes that would not release me, we wept as the screaming sobs of those he had witnessed in such pain rang through the room. 

It is their pain, sweetness. It came from the tears and the toil of the browbeaten as they collected up my cargo from the fields where their freedom died. The creature heard their sorrow, from sunrise to sunset, and now, it wants vengeance. 

Still, we shall not learn. 

They will see me as a madman, and you, as good as a widow. Nobody will hear the call, and nothing will change. 

It’s over, but it’s for nothing. 

Isn’t life funny, sweet darling? 

As I write this last letter, the creature watches me. His bones, soaked in blood, shift as he shuffles closer with hungry, angry eyes. 

I shall see you in the hallowed halls of Hell, hoping that your mere presence can make it as close to Heaven as I could hope to achieve. 

Please know that I didn’t know what the creature would have me do, and that while I hold some responsibility for my actions, not all of the blood on my hands is by my own hand. 

They will tell you that I am a monster, and while perhaps I am, there are far more ferocious phantoms than I, and with my last breath, no matter where I am, I will do everything I can to protect you from them. 

I have always, and will always adore you, and love you, with the most ferocious fervour, and would give anything to feel your tender kiss upon my lips again. 

Ever Yours, 

William