The door is open,I am on both sides of it,but I must walk now. I must pick a side,old loyalties were fiction,my heart lied to me. Protection is pain,driven mad by my own lies.Please tell me my truth.

I’m telling the truth, with a mouth so full of lies. Hear what you want to.

Met you at the movies, sweet hands shaking as you hold me close, stealing a cigarette from me, though you don’t smoke, because you’re choking on nervous energy, and thought it might help. (It didn’t). We got some tickets for later, to see something romantic, so your panic over our actual plans wouldn’t feel like…

If it has to happen, let it happen now, let the world end while I am somewhat satisfied, oh, wheel of fortune, let me die in her arms, vaccinated and placated, no longer reachable by reality, end my life, while I can still hear the harmony of our heartbeats. Meeting her in my dreams each…