The Sadder But Wiser Girl

Seven AM,

and I’m staring rather than sleeping,

risking madness as I risk assess,

again and again,

how dangerous it is,

to be your little doll.

Dropping your name in every dark boulevard,

I walk home,

all alone,

the moon can sense you’ve staked your claim on me,

and hides behind the clouds,

crowding all the stars around her breast,

leaving me with nothing but a dark night,

and a few brave but stupid rats,

trying to impress me,

fighting for scraps of the attention

that they know is no longer mine to give,

because when a boy is bad,

he owns the whole town,

and every inch of the girl he calls his own.

Your reputation wrapped around me,

like a coat that commands loyalty,

based on bribery and fear.

I sleep in your sinful sanctuary,

the sadder but wiser girl,

searching the skies for the helicopters that hunt you,

lulled to sleep by a lullaby of late night gun shots.

Sincerely, Jennifer x